bringing the rain since 1981...

My name doesn't matter, and you probably don't care anyway. All you need to know is that I'm a 29 year old grad student from Southern California, but through a dizzying array of bad decisions, I currently reside in the Midwest. This is my page of schizophrenic ramblings. Some are funny, some deep and philosophical and others just are. Feel free to email me at: maxbetblog@gmail.com.


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my ideal job…

My ideal job?  1st Base Coach for a Major League Baseball team. 

  • PROS:
  • Watch baseball games from the FIELD.  Screw your field level seats, I’m FIELD ON, sucker.
  • Eat sunflower seeds.  Great snack and excellent source of fiber.
  • Endless supply of Gatorade.
  • Dress like a pro athlete.  Everyday is Halloween, but you get PAID for it.
  • You ARE the high five guy.  Single, walk, hit by pitch.  As long as the player is still on 1st, he’s coming to you for a high five.
  • CONS
  • Getting hit by a line a drive and having 40,000+ spectators watch you piss and crap yourself as you flop around and die.  This one should count as 2 cons.
  • Slapping another dude on the ass.  Pro sports needs to let this one go.  Pat on the back is just fine.

Either way you cut it, I bet being a 1st base coach is better than your job.

Notes